A married couple was asleep when the wife suddenly nudged her husband awake at 2 a.m.<\/p>\n
“Honey!”<\/p>\n
The husband groaned.<\/p>\n
“What is it?”<\/p>\n
She whispered nervously:<\/p>\n
“I think there’s a burglar downstairs.”<\/p>\n
Half asleep, he rolled over.<\/p>\n
“Call the police.”<\/p>\n
Then he pulled the blanket over his shoulder and tried to go back to sleep.<\/p>\n
A few minutes later she shook him again.<\/p>\n
“Honey… I heard footsteps.”<\/p>\n
With a dramatic sigh, the husband climbed out of bed.<\/p>\n
He grabbed a baseball bat.<\/p>\n
Straightened his shoulders.<\/p>\n
And marched downstairs like the star of an action movie.<\/p>\n
He searched the kitchen.<\/p>\n
Nothing.<\/p>\n
Checked the dining room.<\/p>\n
Nothing.<\/p>\n
Looked in the garage.<\/p>\n
Nothing.<\/p>\n
After fifteen minutes he returned upstairs.<\/p>\n
“Nobody’s there.”<\/p>\n
His wife frowned.<\/p>\n
“Really?”<\/p>\n
“Yes.”<\/p>\n
“You’re sure?”<\/p>\n
“Positive.”<\/p>\n
She looked strangely disappointed.<\/p>\n
The husband stared at her.<\/p>\n
“Why do you seem upset?”<\/p>\n
She hesitated.<\/p>\n
Then asked:<\/p>\n
“You checked every room?”<\/p>\n
“Every room.”<\/p>\n
“The closets?”<\/p>\n
“Yes.”<\/p>\n
“The basement?”<\/p>\n
“Yes.”<\/p>\n
“The laundry room?”<\/p>\n
“Yes.”<\/p>\n
She sighed.<\/p>\n
The husband narrowed his eyes.<\/p>\n
“Okay… what’s going on?”<\/p>\n
His wife crossed her arms.<\/p>\n
Then quietly said:<\/p>\n
“Because if there really had been a burglar, you would’ve left me up here alone.”<\/p>\n
The husband blinked.<\/p>\n
“What?”<\/p>\n
“You ran downstairs with the bat.”<\/p>\n
“Of course.”<\/p>\n
“And left me here.”<\/p>\n
Silence.<\/p>\n
She continued.<\/p>\n
“The burglar could have come upstairs while you were downstairs.”<\/p>\n
The husband opened his mouth.<\/p>\n
Then closed it.<\/p>\n
Because she had a point.<\/p>\n
A ridiculous point.<\/p>\n
But still a point.<\/p>\n
“So what was I supposed to do?”<\/p>\n
She smiled.<\/p>\n
“Take me with you.”<\/p>\n
“You wanted me to fight a burglar while escorting you around the house at 2 a.m.?”<\/p>\n
“Exactly.”<\/p>\n
The husband laughed.<\/p>\n
“You are unbelievable.”<\/p>\n
But she wasn’t finished.<\/p>\n
A mischievous grin appeared on her face.<\/p>\n
“Actually…”<\/p>\n
The husband immediately became suspicious.<\/p>\n
“Actually what?”<\/p>\n
She leaned closer.<\/p>\n
“There wasn’t a burglar.”<\/p>\n
“I knew it.”<\/p>\n
“There were no footsteps.”<\/p>\n
“I definitely knew it.”<\/p>\n
She smiled even wider.<\/p>\n
“I just wanted to see if you still cared enough to get out of bed for me.”<\/p>\n
The husband stared at her.<\/p>\n
For several seconds.<\/p>\n
Then started laughing.<\/p>\n
Hard.<\/p>\n
The wife looked offended.<\/p>\n
“What’s so funny?”<\/p>\n
He pointed at her.<\/p>\n
“You woke me up at two in the morning for an emotional security test?”<\/p>\n
She nodded proudly.<\/p>\n
“Yes.”<\/p>\n
The husband shook his head.<\/p>\n
Then climbed back into bed.<\/p>\n
His wife moved closer.<\/p>\n
“So?”<\/p>\n
“So what?”<\/p>\n
“Did I pass?”<\/p>\n
The husband thought for a moment.<\/p>\n
Then smiled.<\/p>\n
“No.”<\/p>\n
Her eyes widened.<\/p>\n
“No?”<\/p>\n
“No.”<\/p>\n
“Why not?”<\/p>\n
“Because if there really was a burglar…”<\/p>\n
He paused dramatically.<\/p>\n
“…I would’ve thrown the bat at him and run faster than you.”<\/p>\n
The wife gasped.<\/p>\n
“You wouldn’t!”<\/p>\n
The husband nodded.<\/p>\n
“I absolutely would.”<\/p>\n
She smacked his arm.<\/p>\n
He laughed.<\/p>\n
Then wrapped an arm around her shoulders.<\/p>\n
After a few moments she whispered:<\/p>\n
“You really would protect me though, right?”<\/p>\n
The husband kissed her forehead.<\/p>\n
“Of course.”<\/p>\n
“Even at two in the morning?”<\/p>\n
“Even at two.”<\/p>\n
“Even from burglars?”<\/p>\n
“Even from burglars.”<\/p>\n
She smiled.<\/p>\n
Satisfied at last.<\/p>\n
Then, just as he was drifting back to sleep, she whispered:<\/p>\n
“Honey?”<\/p>\n
He groaned.<\/p>\n
“What now?”<\/p>\n
“I think I heard footsteps again.”<\/p>\n
The husband immediately threw the blanket over his head.<\/p>\n
“Call the burglar and tell him to come back in the morning.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A married couple was asleep when the wife suddenly nudged her husband awake at 2 a.m. “Honey!” The husband groaned. “What is it?” She whispered nervously: “I think there’s a … <\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":65760,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-65759","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-relaxing-story"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/65759","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=65759"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/65759\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":65827,"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/65759\/revisions\/65827"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/65760"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=65759"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=65759"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/relaxingstory.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=65759"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}